Loneliness

Sitting here with my head in my hands crying tears that shouldn't have escaped talking to myself again thinking there's someone here with me feeling emptiness within trying to replace what should have been imagining a place in time "masaya" with this life of mine sadness all around me seeping into my soul aching for attention it's taking control seeking revenge on the should have been psychotic with this pain homicidal to myself i can't win in this life forever losing in this fight surrendering to the lies i've lost the strength to cry.